• Ramia Beladel

"Waiting for Godot to bless me"

My response, Moulay Idriss Zahroun, Fez region, Dec/ 2015

The third year, the third time doing the performance, I was felling quite proud of myself because I kept doing it. The performance day, putting my make up on, fixing the thread on the balloons, wearing my dress, I have found a white chair in the guest home and also plate where I put the white balloons that I could have. This time and for the first time, I had someone who was helping me , he is from Moulay Idriss, he is my first and only audience from the village, but once in the grave yard another female were there, she was waiting for someone, she didn’t want to tell us why she was there. We were setting up the performance and the woman stood watching us, I started my ritual, the feeling was different this time, I wasn’t in the depth of my feelings, the balloons were few, so I couldn’t keep going, I didn’t get in trance. This time my Godot came in this woman, after finishing the performance she came to me and she told : “I know why you are doing this, I know, the  white balloons are like a bride, we plump her  and then we dig her “. My Godot came in this woman who were holding a big bag and was waiting for someone that  she didn’t want  tell us who.



My hotel room, dec2015

Waiting for my Godot to bless me, 2015 (SIDI ALI)

27 déc / third time

This year the prophet's birthday has happened twice, according to the Muslim calendar the two birthday came at the same year  2015. While waiting for the taxi to get to Moulay Idriss I was hearing the taxi drivers calling for Sidi Ali's destination which  gave me chills. In Moulay Idris again for the third time, excitement is on the air,  feelings of comfort and nostalgie. Once in the guest house where I ll be staying for 3 days, I discovered that my room was "purple" again, my balcony has a view in the grave yard where I do the performance.  COINCIDENCE, COLORS, VIBES. I took up my Takchita from my suitcase first which was almost "purple" too, I was obsessed to capture every detail.

I wen to Sidi Ali at the evening, I didn't enjoy much the moussem, the crowds, I meet the same faces doing the same things, I felt a litle bite disconnect, I think my expectations this time were big, I think I needed to see to dig for more profound details which were missing or not to obvious for me. A rondom thought has crossed my mind to not come to Sidi Ali next time and to try another moussem.

I was looking the same evening  for white balloons, I didn't find any it was for me as sign to approve the thought of changing the place.



Waiting for my Godot to bless me, 2015 (SIDI ALI)

28 déc / the day before 

I went to the place where I used to do  the performance, I went to check on the place, to find some eventual traces of last performance, last year I have found "Turtle" instead of the balloons. This time I have found  "White snails", it was difficult to find the place, the vegetation changed. Change is on the air, after not finding many balloons, I have decided to change the space, I was looking for an easy land in order to dig the balloons easily.

I made my decision, next year I ll be doing another moussem.



Waiting for my Godot to bless me, 2015 (SIDI ALI)

29 déc /performance day

The performance day, putting my make up on, fixing the thread on the balloons, wearing my dress, I have found a white chair in the guest home and also plate where I put the white balloons that I could have. This time and for the first time, I had someone who was helping me , he is from Moulay Idriss, he is my first and only audience from the village, but once in the grave yard another female were there, she was waiting for someone, she didn't want to tell us why she was there. We were setting up the performance and the woman stood watching us, I started my ritual, the feeling was different this time, I wasn't in the depth of my feelings, the balloons were few, so I couldn't keep going, I didn't get in trance.

This time my Godot came in this woman, after finishing the performance she came to me and she told : "I know why you are doing this, I know, the  white balloons are like a bride, we plump her  and then we dig her ". My Godot came in this woman who were holding a big bag and was waiting for someone that  she didn't want  tell us who.



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